Pornography: the very word rings alarm bells in a parent’s mind. No parent in their right mind would expose their little ones to pornography. In fact, we go out of our way to protect kids from porn.
However, we live in a dangerous, ugly world where some adults are out to hurt children… and yes, exposing them to porn is one way they do this.
A disturbing rape case that recently occurred cannot emphasise this any further.
Little Girl Gang-Raped by Primary School Boys: What Has the World Come To?
According to news reports, six primary school boys raped an eight-year-old girl due to excessive viewing of pornographic material. The horrifying incident happened in Bogor, Indonesia.
Both the victim and the perpetrators were neighbours. While the victim was playing with her friends, a few of the boys allegedly led her to a goat shed, where they took turns to rape her. The little girl only told her parents about the incident a week later, and it was then that they reported it to local police.
Investigations at the location where the rape occurred then ensued. The girl was taken to a public health center to provide information on the case. The police also interrogated the culprits and the victim’s parents.
The initial trigger to this grotesque rape case was the fact that the six boys began frequently watching pornographic videos after being introduced to them by a 24 year old widower, named Yarmani. This fact has been confirmed by Bogor’s police chief Andi M.Dicky, who clarified that the rape was inspired by a pornographic video the young boys were shown.
“Upon interrogation, the culprit admitted to showing pornographic films to the six boys at his house,” says Dicky, as quoted from liputan.6.com.
Apparently, in the village where incidents occurred, older kids do tend to play and meet with younger kids. What’s worse is that Yarmani himself was only educated until Primary 4, and did not have the mental maturity of an adult, as indicated in kriminolog.id.
Meanwhile, a witness who wished to remain anonymous from Tribun Wow explained, ” Yeah, there are rumours of an adult male who likes inviting children to view pornogrpahic videos or photos in his house. It’s possible that the children have viewed this inappropriate material many times — not just once or twice — so that could have had an effect.”
Porn addiction can have serious consequences. | Source: stock photo
After the incident, the six boys underwent rehabilitation. However, the High Commission General of the National Police Criminal Investigation Unit, Ari Dono Sukmanto, said that the six boys will still be judged under law.
“Of course, we will still use regulations according to juvenile law as opposed to adult law. Rape is a serious case, having the potential to not only destroy the physical aspects of the victim, but even cripple their mental health and social life,” explains Ari.
In addition, the perpetrator, Mr Yarmani, was also arrested by local police. Incriminating evidence ranging from a TV unit, six DVDs and pornographic films and a DVD player have also been secured by the police. As a result of his actions, the perpetrator will be subjected to five years behind bars, as stated in the law.
Ways to Protect Kids from Porn Online, Paedophiles and Predators
The National Police Criminal Investigation Unit attributes this incident to an increasingly indifferent and individualistic society. Mr Sukmanto agrees, saying that parents and the environment around these children also contribute to this incident occurring. He urges parents to reflect upon themselves as caregivers and educators at home.
“Don’t try to give excuses such as being busy by work. Parents are also educators and law enforcers at home, including simple tasks such as limiting internet use to kids. In fact parents uninvolved in the growth of children who don’t spend quality time may also lead to the child misbehaving,” observes Mr Sukmanto.
We at theAsianparent wholeheartedly agree with Mr. Sukmanto. That being said, we have compiled some tips from previous articles to protect your children from paedophiles, from carers, and when they are online.
Are you sure the sites your child is visiting are safe?
- Stay alert. Don’t ever take safety for granted. Be wary of who is around. Do you spot strangers snapping pictures of your kids or other little ones? Remind your child’s caregivers to always stay alert too.
Don’t judge a book by its cover. Predators don’t discriminate by race — they choose children of all colours, shapes and sizes. They might even look like a nice person, or may even be someone you know. Parents should take caution all the time no matter where they are or who they’re around.
When with Carers:
Be vigilant. Does your child seem to behave differently? Are there any any bruises on their body? A good tip is to shower your child as the day ends so you are aware of any changes that might happen. If there are wounds, investigate them immediately.
Listen to your child and have open conversations. By this we mean be genuinely interested about their life — school, activities, friends, hobbies — and let them know that you support them no matter what happens. Don’t interrupt. Ask about who she enjoyed talking to most, if she felt happy or sad. Somewhere in her narrative you’ll be able to find out if your child is happy or stressed.
- Teach your kids about the dangers of the internet. Educate them about fads, cyberbullying, and, depending on age, child pornography. Tell them the consequences of these things — such as suicides from cyber bullying — and encourage them to use technology wisely.
- Talk to your kids about how dangerous talking to online strangers can be. Teach them to treat online strangers as they would in person. Tell them to never undress themselves, teach them to block strangers, be wary of who their “friends” are, and what they post on social media.
- Agree on internet rules. Discuss which sites they have permission to visit, when they can use the internet, and how much time they can stay online. View their sites with them, and let them show you how they use it.
Other Ways to Protect Kids from Porn: What Can Parents Do?
What’s even worse about exposing such content to kids is that they may not be aware of the dangers of what they are doing.
Reza Indragiri, forensic psychologist and Head of Fulfillment of Children’s Rights and the Institution for Protection of Indonesian Children, explains why:
“When children watch such explicit content, they will try to copy this behaviour in real life. They might not know that their actions can cause suffering and are dangerous, and may not have any sexual motives. However, understanding a rapist’s mindset does risk them to raping again in the future. Thus, even the perpetrators can also be considered victims, as they have to undergo rehabilitation.”
Prevention is always better than cure, parents! Here’s how you can protect your kids from porn:
Being overly-emotional, angry, concerned and confused is normal… but won’t get you anywhere. Perhaps these four words are enough to describe your feelings as a parent when you first find out that your child often watches adult videos.
However, the first thing you must do is to calm yourself down. This is so that you can begin a conversation with your child in an even-tempered manner.
2. Avoid Scolding Them
Trust us, scolding a kid after catching him viewing inappropriate content doesn’t work. It will only make him find a thousand excuses to justify his actions. Not only that, children can argue back, too.
Instead, what needs to be done is to talk with your child and get him to open up to you. Don’t forget to rope in your hubby! He can give reminders and explain to your child the risks of frequently watching pornographic videos.
Remaining calm and talking to your children is key to clarifying doubts, resolving issues, and moving forward. | Source: stock photo
3. Provide Additional Supervision or Surveillance
What else can you do once you know that your child frequently watches pornographic videos? Parents can take the extra step by providing extra supervision at home and in school. This includes limiting their access to viewing adult videos and being wary of who they befriend.
We at theAsianparent hope that this article on how to protect kids from porn has been helpful. It is our hope that parents can care for their children better by shedding some light on the dangers of porn exposure to young children.